Shopping Quotes and Sayings

Shopping Quotes

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping.  ~Bo Derek

When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping.  Men invade another country.  It's a whole different way of thinking.  ~Elayne Boosler

If men liked shopping, they'd call it research.  ~Cynthia Nelms

A consumer is a shopper who is sore about something.  ~Harold Coffin

Shopping is a woman thing.  It's a contact sport like football.  Women enjoy the scrimmage, the noisy crowds, the danger of being trampled to death, and the ecstasy of the purchase.  ~Erma Bombeck

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her.  ~Marcelene Cox

Shopping tip:  You can get shoes for 85 cents at the bowling alley.  ~Author Unknown

I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist.  ~Tammy Faye Bakker

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.  ~Joan Rivers

A Christmas shopper's complaint is one of long-standing.  ~Author Unknown

People will buy anything that is one to a customer.  ~Sinclair Lewis

The other line moves faster.  ~Etorre's Observation

Buying something on sale is a very special feeling.  In fact, the less I pay for something, the more it is worth to me.  I have a dress that I paid so little for that I am afraid to wear it.  I could spill something on it, and then how would I replace it for that amount of money?  ~Rita Rudner

We used to build civilizations.  Now we build shopping malls.  ~Bill Bryson

I like my money right where I can see it - hanging in my closet.  ~From the television show Sex and the City

A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist.  ~Franklin P. Jones

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.  ~Ilie Nastase

I love to go shopping.  I love to freak out salespeople.  They ask me if they can help me, and I say, "Have you got anything I'd like?"  Then they ask me what size I need, and I say, "Extra medium."  ~Steven Wright

The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.  ~Erma Bombeck

I've been shopping all my life and still have nothing to wear.  ~Author Unknown

Anyone who believes the competitive spirit in America is dead has never been in a supermarket when the cashier opens another checkout line.  ~Ann Landers

The woman just ahead of you at the supermarket checkout has all the delectable groceries you didn't even know they carried.  ~Mignon McLaughlin

A bargain ain't a bargain unless it's something you need.  ~Sidney Carroll

Credit buying is much like being drunk.  The buzz happens immediately and gives you a lift.... The hangover comes the day after.  ~Joyce Brothers

Only one shopping day left 'til tomorrow.  ~Author Unknown

I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.  ~Steven Wright

If the shoe fits, buy it in every color!  ~Author Unknown

Shopping:  The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have.  ~Author Unknown

I shop like a bull - I charge everything!  ~Author Unknown

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. ~Dave Barry, "Christmas Shopping: A Survivor's Guide"

Unless you live in Indonesia, there should be several malls within five miles of your home. It makes no difference whatsoever which one you go to: Under federal law, all malls in the United States must have the same 42 chain stores. ~Dave Barry, "Christmas Shopping: A Survivor's Guide"

On the one hand, shopping is dependable:  You can do it alone, if you lose your heart to something that is wrong for you, you can return it; it's instant gratification and yet something you buy may well last for years.  ~Judith Krantz

The only reason a great many American families don't own an elephant is that they have never been offered an elephant for a dollar down and easy weekly payments.  ~Mad Magazine

Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money.  ~Author Unknown

Shopping is better than sex.  If you're not satisfied after shopping you can make an exchange for something you really like.  ~Adrienne Gusoff

But it is a cold, lifeless business when you go to the shops to buy something, which does not represent your life and talent, but a goldsmith's.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.  ~Oscar Wilde